A young reporter was given the opportunity to interview a very successful, very wealthy banker. The reporter asked him, "Sir, What is the secret of your success?"
He said "Two words, young man."
"And, Sir, what are they?"
"Right decisions."
"But how do you make right decisions?"
"One word." he responded.
"And, sir, What is that?"
"Experience."
"And how do you get Experience?"
"Two words"
"And, Sir, what are they?"
The banker replied with a smile, "Wrong decisions."
Dear God, Give us a sense of humour, Give us the grace to see a joke, To get some humour out of life, And pass it on to other folk ..........
Saturday, September 18, 2010
phone bill
The phone bill was exceptionally high and the man of the house called a family meeting... on a Saturday morning... after breakfast...
Dad: People this is unacceptable. OK I do not use this phone, I use the one at the office but you too have to limit the use of the phone.
Mum: Same here, I hardly use this home telephone as I use my work telephone.
Son: Me too, I never use the home phone. I always use my company mobile.
All of them now in a state of shock and together they look at their maid who until now is patiently listening to them
Maid (un-baffled) : So - what is the problem? We all use our work telephones!
Dad: People this is unacceptable. OK I do not use this phone, I use the one at the office but you too have to limit the use of the phone.
Mum: Same here, I hardly use this home telephone as I use my work telephone.
Son: Me too, I never use the home phone. I always use my company mobile.
All of them now in a state of shock and together they look at their maid who until now is patiently listening to them
Maid (un-baffled) : So - what is the problem? We all use our work telephones!
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
FATHER and SONS
There was a father who called his 5 small children together.
As the sat together in a circle on the floor the dad placed a toy in the middle.
He explained to them that he won this toy as a door prize and he wanted to give it to one of them.
He asked them "who is the most obedient?"
Five sets of eyes looked up at him.
Sensing that they didn't understand the word he then asked, "ok, who always obeys mommy, and does everything she says?"
One of the children picked up the toy and handed it to the father. "You win!" exclaimed the child.
As the sat together in a circle on the floor the dad placed a toy in the middle.
He explained to them that he won this toy as a door prize and he wanted to give it to one of them.
He asked them "who is the most obedient?"
Five sets of eyes looked up at him.
Sensing that they didn't understand the word he then asked, "ok, who always obeys mommy, and does everything she says?"
One of the children picked up the toy and handed it to the father. "You win!" exclaimed the child.
WOMAN;''''''''''''''''''
An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they hated Each other.
When they had a confrontation, screaming and yelling could be Heard deep into the night...
The old man would shout, 'When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the
Grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!'
Neighbours feared him. They believed he practiced black magic because of the
Many strange occurrences that took place in their neighbourhood.
The old man liked the fact that he was feared.
To everyone's relief, he died
Of a heart attack when he was 98.
His wife had a closed casket at the wake.
After the burial, she went Straight to the local bar and began to party, as if there was no tomorrow.
Her neighbours, concerned for her safety, asked, 'Aren't you afraid that he
May indeed be able to dig his way up and out of the grave and come back to
Haunt you for the rest of your life?'
The wife put down her drink and said, 'Let him dig. I had him buried upside Down.'
Damn!!! Women, they think of everything!!!!
When they had a confrontation, screaming and yelling could be Heard deep into the night...
The old man would shout, 'When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the
Grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!'
Neighbours feared him. They believed he practiced black magic because of the
Many strange occurrences that took place in their neighbourhood.
The old man liked the fact that he was feared.
To everyone's relief, he died
Of a heart attack when he was 98.
His wife had a closed casket at the wake.
After the burial, she went Straight to the local bar and began to party, as if there was no tomorrow.
Her neighbours, concerned for her safety, asked, 'Aren't you afraid that he
May indeed be able to dig his way up and out of the grave and come back to
Haunt you for the rest of your life?'
The wife put down her drink and said, 'Let him dig. I had him buried upside Down.'
Damn!!! Women, they think of everything!!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)